Growing up, I’ve always seen marriage as being this fairytale. You know, like the kind that you see in movies. I dreamed about having a big wedding, walking down the aisle, and just living my best life.

But the truth of the matter is, I never really saw exactly what it took to create an unbreakable bond between two people. That was until I met my husband!

My husband and I started dating long-distance. After about two years of dating each other, we moved in together, and a little over a year later, we got engaged.

RELATED: 5 LESSONS YOU LEARN WHEN YOU MOVE IN WITH YOUR PARTNER

Shortly after that, we got married! Now we’re heading into our second year of marriage, and I thought it would be a great idea to reflect and share a few things that have helped us along the way. I hope this post encourages you and helps you look beyond the expectations you’ve set based on others or what social media has displayed them to be. Because each relationship is unique and marriage is challenging, but it’s honestly a blessing!

A FEW THINGS TO REMEMBER

• Communicating with your partner and discussing any issues you may have is crucial to creating a healthy dynamic in your marriage.
• Listening and valuing your spouse’s feelings is just as important as you being heard or understood.
• Honesty and trust go hand and hand. No matter what, always be honest. Therefore, you’ll never damage the trust that you’ve built. If you are rebuilding that trust, focus on being honest, and the rest will follow.
• Intimacy in marriage is vital. This creates a feeling of closeness and keeps the connection between you and your spouse strong by being spiritually, emotionally, and physically intimate with each other.
• Respect and value each other’s thoughts and opinions.
• Dating your partner is a great way to keep the spark alive in your relationship. Here are 8 date ideas you can try at home!
• Love your spouse unconditionally. Whether things are going well or bad, be committed to loving your partner through the great and not so great moments of life.

3 WAYS TO THRIVE IN YOUR FIRST YEAR OR MARRIAGE

SELF REFLECT

In my first year of marriage, I did a lot of self-reflection. I knew I had to get real with myself and focus on things that needed attention to have a successful marriage.

It’s so easy to point out the flaws in others and overlook our own.

When you take a second to evaluate yourself and improve things that aren’t adding any positive value to your marriage, then you’ll see a change. When you’re working on becoming the best version of yourself, it opens space for growth and togetherness. Instead of trying to change your partner, work on improving yourself, and as a result, you’ll see a change in your marriage!

WORK THROUGH THE DIFFERENCES

Always remember that, at the end of the day, you’re a team!

There was a point in time that, as a wife, I expected my husband to react and respond the way that I wanted him to. I realized that I needed to change if I wanted a healthy and successful marriage that we both could enjoy.

My husband and I are alike in many ways, yet we see a lot of things differently. Before being married, we learned how to work through the differences by communicating, compromising, and respecting each other’s feelings. I can say that our differences have always brought us closer.

When it comes to working through things as a couple, it’s about finding common ground. Meeting each other halfway and not allowing any differences to come in between you and your spouse. There will be ups and downs no matter what, but how you approach and move forward will determine how you move forward as a couple.

There’s already enough daily stress we go through daily, so why not create peace in our marriage. No marriage is perfect. However, life is much easier when you’re going through it together. You can have a happy marriage and enjoy your marriage with your spouse through the differences. Which leads me to my final piece of advice.

ALWAYS AIM FOR GROWTH

Your relationship doesn’t stop now that you’re married. Even after marriage, you need to be physically and emotionally present.

You have to keep reminding yourself that although you’re married to this wonderful person, you should always seek to learn more about them and what makes them feel valued as a husband/wife. Life changes, people change, and so will you!

As life continues to proceed, many changes will also occur. Since being married, I’ve seen so much growth within my husband and myself. Therefore, we experience change, and although we may grow in different areas at different paces, our marriage will always benefit from the effort we give. Why? Because growth is growth, and no matter what, it’ll always manifest into your marriage as long as you do the work!

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